The Fired For Now Totally Unscientific Tally of Sacrifice
Yesterday I invited readers to share the sacrifices they’ve made following job loss. What they’ve had to give up in the face of some harsh economic truths. Certainly, 2009 was the year many of us took a look in the mirror and asked, what do we really need.
Reader dbvanhorn put it very well: “…there’s so much crap we’re told we can’t live without, until we do.”
At the other end of the spectrum are the intangibles. Those things we give up that have nothing to do with the stuff we buy, but the stuff that defines who we are inside.
Tina wrote, “The biggest thing I feel I’ve given up, or maybe “lost” is a better word, is my sense of what’s “normal”. Me…a stay at home mom??? Crazy. But here I am. Me…not traveling all over the place bring home the paycheck??? Crazy. But here I am. Me…not the working powerhouse my kids have always known? Crazy, crazy, crazy. It’s not awful, and I enjoy the time with my family. We laugh together more then ever. But it is a big adjustment and has re-calibrated the image of the me I once knew.”
But back to the crap, as db calls it. I thought I’d do a tally based on the comments in yesterday’s post. It’s hardly statistically valid and completely unscientific but herewith are the numbers. There was a lot of response to the post and I simply counted up all the occasions the different items were mentioned by different people.
It’s a bit of snapshot on what becomes expendable when we’re forced to make cut-backs. Some of it is truly expendable – like Netflix. Some of it isn’t expendable at all – like medical insurance – which makes me mad as hell. But as you see right off, eating out tops the list by a long shot. I suppose that’s exactly why restaurateurs everywhere are anxiously awaiting what is usually the industry’s busiest day of the year, Mother’s Day arriving this Sunday. Uh, sorry owners, mine will be spent right at home.
The Fired For Now Totally Unscientific Tally of Sacrifice
| Eating out | 10 |
| Brand names and expensive foods at the supermarket | 5 |
| Netflix | 3 |
| Shopping for clothes, etc. | 3 |
| Buying books (replaced with libraries) | 4 |
| Choice on cable (replaced with basic cable) | 2 |
| Unnecessary car trips | 3 |
| Video game rentals | 2 |
| Bus & Train Trips | 2 |
| Movies (at the theatre) | 3 |
| High-speed Internet access (replaced with slower access) | 1 |
| Nanny | 1 |
| Wine | 1 |
| Watering the grass | 1 |
| Photography Film (replaced by shooting with digital only) | 1 |
| Medical insurance | 1 |
| Lower deductible on car insurance (replaced with higher deductible) | 1 |
| Massages | 1 |
| Utilities | 1 |
| Social events | 1 |
| Gifts | 1 |
| Hair cuts (replaced by do-it-yourself) | 1 |
| Investment property | 1 |
| Drinks at bars | 1 |
| Casino visits | 1 |
| Concerts and plays | 1 |
PW said:
May 08, 09 at 11:45 pmHi FFN - I’d like to respond to your previous post as well as add a new category or two to this post. I knew that things were starting to get rocky mid-way through last year when it became harder and more challenging to find the next contract - things looked promising and then suddenly the “opportunity” vanished. So throughout this period, I’ve had to give up:
- A good part of my pride
- My sense that things were going to be “okay”
- Financial independence
- Part of my confidence and self-esteem
At the same time, I’ve learned how to “shove” all that deep into my pockets and to remember that I’m trying to meet my obligations and to ensure to the extent possible that my dogs experience no changes in their lives. It’s admittedly very expensive but I’d like to look back once “I’m back on my feet” that in spite of all the hardship and the personal damage, I never let it affect their lives.
Karol said:
May 11, 09 at 12:19 pmHow about …
A sense of worth, accomplishment, direction? Sometimes it is also a sense of guilt. When I was first laid off I thought I would never survive this but I have. My sense fo worth back in the day of holding down a job, gave me a feeling of worth, and when I completed a task, acoomplishment and the guilt now i feel is because even though I like to work, I get a great deal of satisfaction from working, I feel guilty because I don’t feel like I need a job to define who I am, where I want to go and what I want to eventually do with my life. If that makes any sense. I don’t need to feel like work rules me. I feel a loss for the person who I use to be but much much happier with the one I am. I look at this experience as a step forward to the new things I can acoomplish, and be proud of- work or no work. It has been hard, to say the least, but I have always thrived on working under pressure and get the job done. Now I feel that I am more willing to be more relaxed and less rushed. And when something comes up, like the events in my life, relocating, graduaion, packing just to name a few, i know that I can handle it- just not in the same sense as when I was working. i find it a bit different. My priorites have changed, and I have a different sense of worth now. A much better one.
Rebecca said:
Aug 22, 09 at 2:25 pmI would also add that my sense of hope for the future has been diminished. I was very sure about my plans to continue with graduate school because I figured I could just go get a job somewhere while I was in school and then get a “real” job once I graduated. Then I got fired from a job that I thought was a total no-brainer. Now I am questioning my choice of studies — will it be practical? Will I be able to get a job? How will I pay for basic living expenses AND tuition? Can I even get more student loans, since I haven’t paid off the ones from my BA yet?
Self Esteem said:
Aug 30, 09 at 2:56 amgreat post… i am such a blog nut so thanks for the free information.. keep up the good work
Angeline @ DIY solar power said:
Oct 07, 09 at 5:40 amVery interesting information. Concentrating on various activities will give people proper guidance in maintaining work pressure. Angeline @ DIY solar power
Marthe @ Style Shopping said:
Oct 18, 09 at 7:31 amWell, to enumerate, I sacrificed the following while I was unemployed some months ago:
- shopping for exepensive clothes
- buying expensive toys for my son
- visiting movie houses to watch a movie
- cut down on holidays with my family
and most of the things mentioned in your post.
Chuck said:
Oct 22, 09 at 9:41 pmI sacrificed my marriage… oh, wait, that was forced on me.
Actually, I don’t feel like I sacrificed much now that I’m used to frugal living. Frugal is the new black.
Buy UGG Boots said:
Oct 31, 09 at 10:11 pmI would also add that my sense of hope for the future has been diminished. I was very sure about my plans to continue with graduate school because I figured I could just go get a job somewhere while I was in school and then get a “real” job once I graduated. Then I got fired from a job that I thought was a total no-brainer. Now I am questioning my choice of studies — will it be practical? Will I be able to get a job? How will I pay for basic living expenses AND tuition? Can I even get more student loans, since I haven’t paid off the ones from my BA yet?
Melina said:
Nov 09, 09 at 2:28 pmI think that the time with our family is tho most important. When I ask myself after 8-10 hour work day wouldnt be better if I spend that time with my family…
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Tim P said:
Nov 23, 09 at 5:37 amInteresting little snapshot. For me, the first thing that goes is going out - which seems to agree with others. Eating out and nights in the bar are certainly reduced.
zygor guides said:
Dec 14, 09 at 8:37 pmThose things we give up that have nothing to do with the stuff we buy, but the stuff that defines who we are inside.
Hello kitty said:
Dec 19, 09 at 1:04 amAt the other end of the spectrum are the intangibles. Those things we give up that have nothing to do with the stuff we buy, but the stuff that defines who we are inside.
torrent games downloads said:
Dec 23, 09 at 6:36 am“Those things we give up that have nothing to do with the stuff we buy, but the stuff that defines who we are inside.”
Incredible definition..
DIY Solar Power said:
Jan 14, 10 at 10:22 pmthought provoking post, for me, giving up movies, nights out and coffee shops comes with unemployment
Peyronie's Disease Treatment said:
Jan 14, 10 at 10:23 pmSometimes the things we give up when a situation like unemployment arises, make us realise just how much uneccessary surplus stuff we haev in our lives that eat into our budgets, it can be quite an enlightning experience